1. The doors are never locked. 2. The Call to Worship is “Ya’ll come on in!” 3. People grumble about Noah letting coyotes on the Ark. 4. The Preacher says, “I’d like to ask Bubba to take up the offering”, and five men stand up. 5. The restrooms are outside. 6. Opening day of deer or quail hunting season is recognized as an official church holiday. 7. A member requests to be buried in his four-wheel drive truck because, “I ain’t ever been in a hole it couldn’t get me out of.” 8. In the annual stewardship drive there is […]
I had this idea that I could rope a deer, put it in a stall, feed it up on corn for a couple of weeks, then kill it and eat it. The first step in this adventure was getting a deer. I figured that, since they congregate at my cattle feeder and do not seem to have much fear of me when we are there (a bold one will sometimes come right up and sniff at the bags of feed while I am in the back of the truck not 4 feet away), it should not be difficult to rope one, get up to it and toss a bag over its head (to calm it down) then hog tie it and transport it home.
posted by staff (Adapted from The Chain of Love) (Belton, Texas) One evening a man saw an elderly old woman stranded on the side of the road, but even in the dim light of the late afternoon, he could see she needed help. So he pulled up in front of her fancy car and got out. His old Pontiac was still sputtering when he approached her. Even with the smile on his face, she was worried. No one had stopped to help for the last hour or so. Was he going to hurt her? He didn’t look safe; he […]
posted by staff A big city lawyer went quail hunting in West Texas. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a pasture on the other side of the fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, a crusty old rancher rode up and asked him what he was doing. The attorney responded, “I shot a quail. It fell into this field, and now I’m going to retrieve it.” The old rancher retorted, “This is my property, and you are not coming over here.” The indignant lawyer said, “I am one of the best trial attorneys in the […]
Author Unknown . A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push. “Not a chance,” says the husband, “it is 3:00 in the morning!” He slams the door and returns to bed. . “Who was that?” asked his wife… “Just some drunk guy asking for a push,” he answers. … “Did you help him?” she asks “No, I did not, it’s 3am in the morning and it’s bloomin’ well […]
The Basics Of Grilling Grilling is just like any other kind of cooking, it is a learned art. Keep this in mind as you are learning. You are sure to have some failures. The major difference between grilling and cooking on the stove or in the oven is that grilling is a combination of the two. You have direct heat from the gas burners or the charcoal and you have indirect heat that fills the grill when the lid is put down. Grills also have higher heat and less control over that heat. With your oven you can set the […]
I made the move from The Panhandle to The Hill Country 15 years ago. The difference was astounding! I remember the first time I was driving down the highway and someone pulled over to let me pass. I had never seen this before and I knew I had found my new home. The people of Central Texas were the friendliest group of people I had ever encountered. When you walked into a convenience store to get a coke, you were greeted by whatever clerk happened to be on duty that day. It didn’t matter what they were doing, they stopped to say “hi”, “good morning”, or “how are you?”, but that was 15 years ago.
by Boyd Taylor . There is finally an explanation why people who live in older neighborhoods with large trees have less stress than those in new subdivisions, and it is not because people in the older areas tend to be wealthier and their neighborhoods more expensive. A City of Austin arborist says big trees have emotional benefits. He says there is less neighborhood stress when big trees are around. .Council will consider a program at its next meeting to bus residents from small-tree areas into big-tree neighborhoods for therapy sessions. “There will be individual and group therapy sessions, including tree-hugging […]
by Julia Robb Matilda Lockhart’s nose may not have started the Comanche wars in Texas, but it’s fair to say the condition of Matilda’s nose escalated the Comanche war from skirmishes to a furnace of death and destruction. And the Comanche wars created Texas culture. If we are a tough-minded people, it’s because Texans fought the Comanche for more than 35 years. Briefly, here’s what happened. Comanches raided in Texas from the time settlers began arriving in the 1820’s, but it wasn’t full-blown warfare. Then in March, 1840, Penateka Comanche leaders said they wanted peace. (Comanche bands included, among others, […]
by Melvin Edwards Jackie Robinson had two Texas connections. First, he was court martialed while serving in Fort Hood in Killeen. (He was acquitted, though admittedly “guilty” of refusing to give up his seat on the military bus. He was “Rosa Parks” 10 years before she was.) A couple of years later, he served as the basketball coach at Sam Huston College — now part of Huston-Tillotson University — in Austin. . . The first of those Texas connections was barely mentioned in the current movie “42” and the second one wasn’t relevant. Though subtitle of the movie is “The […]
by Julia Robb Texas has a problem. The wimps of this world hate courage. And because so many intellectuals are wimps, they pour contempt on Texas, on Texas heroes and our history. Small people tear down big ones, especially when the bigger souls are dead and can’t fight back. Faced with the Mexican army, those same wimps would run. I’m going to tell you about our Texas heroes in coming weeks, but this blog is about William Barrett Travis, commander of the Alamo when it fell on March 6, 1836. Travis was born in South Carolina in 1809 and […]
In every man, woman and child on this planet, there is a person who wishes just once he could be a real live Texan and get up on a horse or ride off in a pickup. There is a little bit of Texas in everyone.
A Yankee is invited to be a chili taster. His experience is hilarious.
by Boyd Taylor It has been a record year for UT athletics. Football, basketball and baseball have all placed in the bottom of the Big 12 Conference standings. According to Athletic Director DeLoss Dodds, “We are finally getting the program where we want it to be. The money we are spending on athlete amenities is finally paying off in better adjusted student athletes, free of the win-at-all-costs atmosphere present at so many lesser rated schools. ” He went on to say, ” Our supporters are contributing millions so that our players do not have to win. No wonder UT is […]
by Jon Williams Prologue This book has been a work of love for several years. As with any book, it is almost complete, but it is not nearly done as every time I read it I make little changes here and there. If you know me, you know that I was adopted. If you don’t you do now. My father, the one who adopted me, and my only father, just to be clear was pastoring a small Baptist church in Corpus Christi when he met Lester Roloff. That is where the story begins for me. A few years ago I […]